top of page
  • SPAM

(SPAM Cut) 'I'm on My Way' by MeUndies

Poster with lorry symbol that reads 'In light of the COVID-19 outbreak, please expect delays in shipping and deliveing your order. We appreciate your patience and understanding as we all work through this together. I'm on My Way A Haiku By Your Order Through the lonely mail, / I travel in search of you. / So we can be one.'

Torkel Tennberg muses on a snazzy wee haiku from 'The World's Most Comfortable Underwear' company, MeUndies.

> So there I was, purchasing some (hopefully high quality) animal print underwear online, and after securing the transaction I came to find a company Haiku in my gmail inbox. What fun! I couldn’t let such a rare find go unnoticed so now I shall decimate your futile attempts to sneakily enter into the poetry realm.

When you step into the circle with a wild bull you must bear the brunt of its horns.

“Through the lonely mail, I travel in search of you. So we can be one.”

Personifying an inanimate object is quite the nifty little cheap charm that I’d expect from an online store that is so obviously and very desperately attempting to appeal to a younger clientele. Imagine the horror story one could write after the undies have been worn by a customer; chaffed cheeks, stray pubic hairs, sweat streaks, discharge and dank smells. God forbid crabs. I’m not even going to bring up their returns policy.

> As for the 'lonely mail' statement - statistically the US postal service alone handles over 471 million pieces of mail each day, so unless the extended international mail system as a whole is a sea of lonely fish, all flowing in other directions, then I wholeheartedly contend your claim.

> 'So we can be one' - I actually like this line as it reminds me of my favourite film series, starring Tobey Maguire as Spider-Man. I imagine that the underwear will be like Venom’s symbiote suit, and I will become cool like Tobey Maguire did when he became addicted to the lure of the all black spidey suit. Please do not research what he did during that portion of the film, also do not look into the shady past of MeUndies founder: Jonathan Shokrian, alleged anti clean air activist of Beverly Hills.

> Overall not a bad little poem, made me giggle, and I do like the colours of the graphic. If I find the underwear to be quite comfy after it has arrived then I will be sure to leave a 5 star review.


Text: Torkel Tennberg

Published: 1/9/20


bottom of page